Is My Teen Out of Control?
How can you tell the difference between normal teenage behavior and troubled teenage behavior when mood swings and drama are so common? Luckily, there are some red flags of risky behavior that you can look for:- Drinking or drug use
- Shoplifting
- Self-harm
- Skipping school
- Spending time with the wrong crowd
- Extreme isolation
- Violence
Tips for Handling Out-of-Control Teens
If your teen is regularly demonstrating any of the behaviors above, you should consider a plan of intervention. Here are seven tips for dealing with out-of-control teens.- Set rules - Teenagers need boundaries to help them navigate adolescence. Make house rules that are clear, reasonable, and enforceable. This way, your child will learn that negative behavior has consequences at home or out in the world.
- Practice active listening - Work on listening to your teen without interruption, interrogation, or judgment. This builds trust and lets your child know they are being heard entirely and loved.
- Stay calm - It's easy to feed an angry outburst with your own yelling and personal attacks. And while it can be hard to stay calm when your child is acting out, it will give them an excellent example of how to handle intense emotions properly. This can also help you keep your active listening going. Use some deep breathing techniques if you can.
- Know their friends - Do your best to know your child's friends. Make your house where they want to hang out, if possible. Peer pressure is brutal during the teenage years, so this way, you can get an idea of which friends might be bad influences on your child and get involved early if you see any signs of danger.
- Find common ground - Your child will always be your baby, but your teenager does not want to be seen that way. Work on finding new common interests as their favorite activities change with their development. This will help you maintain trust and stay connected to keep them on the right path.
- Don't try to do it alone - Take advantage of your built-in support system. You probably already have some close friends you met because your children used to play together (or hang out together now). Don't hesitate to bounce your problems off of them. They might be experiencing some of the same unruly behavior at home with their teen. Consider this self-care that will help you be in a suitable mental space to support your teen.
- When all else fails, seek a professional - If you're at the end of your rope, it's time to turn to someone who specializes in treating troubled teenagers. In extreme cases, boarding schools can even be the best option if your teen needs to completely disconnect from a circle of friends who are getting into severe addiction or crime.
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